Desperate.

I rediscovered Phil Joel today, and was reminded why I LOVE his music. Anyway, I heard the lyrics to the song "Desperate" and couldn't help but smile...this is without a doubt my 2009-2010 theme song. :)

Lord, thank You for these days
Lord, thank You for these days
This has been the most trying year
Of testing and refining here
And I wouldn't have it any other way
Lord, thank You for these days
And I will always choose to praise You

Lord, thank You for this place
Lord, thank You for Your grace
There is mercy in the midst of tests
An oasis in this wilderness
And Your light to lead my way
Lord, thank You for this place
And I will always choose to praise You

And I wanna stay
Desperate
I will remain
Desperate
For You

Lord I thank You for this rain
Healing waters when there's pain
There are rivers of Your providence
Surrounding our obedience
In Your faithfulness, I put my faith
So Lord I thank You for this rain
And I will always choose to praise You

Pray☮Make☮Live☮

Katie :)

one beautiful spring night :)

Tonight, the weather was perfect. Instead of doing homework, we decided to play outside. Great life decision. I love our campus now that it’s getting green; it was covered in snow when I visited and when I moved here! These are some of the pretty pictures we took on our adventures! :)

Flowers along the Riley Creek.

Adams Bridge & Ropp Hall, our soon to be home! :)

The Riley & the library field...our beautiful, spacious front yard!

Trees. Sun. You know.

College Hall.

Life is beautiful. :)

Have a fabulous week!

Week 13. Thursday.

It’s Thursday of week 13 of the spring semester here at Bluffton. To most people today is just another day, but it’s kind of a big deal to me. I withdrew from ONU on Wednesday of my 13th week there. So Thursday of week 13 at Bluffton means that I’ve officially been here for longer than I was at ONU. I’ve been intentional this week about remembering the journey that led me here, thanking God for this place, and reflecting on how these 13 weeks at Bluffton have shaped who I am and who I hope to become. It’s amazing, really, when I take time to think and pray and reflect…God is so faithful. But in a way, it’s strange to compare this week 13 to the last one. Week 13 at ONU was the end of what, at the time, felt like some sort of huge mistake. On this Thursday of week 13 at Bluffton, I have a completely different perspective. I know these 13 weeks are only the beginning of what God has in store for me here.

I remember a few conversations I had while I was home over Christmas before I moved to Bluffton. They went something like this: “Well, I just hope Bluffton is what you’re looking for. You know, no place is perfect. I just hope it doesn't disappoint you.” These conversations frustrated me at the time, but I know these people love me and were concerned about what seemed to them like a quick decision that I might regret later. It was a quick decision. And it’s true; no place is perfect. But the trick isn’t finding a perfect place...the trick is finding the perfect place for you. And thanks be to God, these 13 weeks have been exactly what I was looking for. My time here has surpassed my greatest expectations. And Bluffton isn’t perfect, but it’s the perfect place for me!

So thanks, God, for a week 13 marked by beginnings instead of endings. And thanks for second chances!

“Remember the long way that the Lord your God has led you these forty years in the wilderness, in order to humble you, testing you to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commandments. For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land, a land with flowing streams, with springs and underground waters welling up in valleys and hills, where you will lack nothing.”
–Deuteronomy 8.2,7-8

Katie :)

it’s week 12?!

How did that happen?! It seems impossible that we only have three more weeks of classes left this semester, and even more impossible that I’ve been at Bluffton for three months already! But hey, time flies when you’re having the time of your life! Summer is just around the corner, and I’m not ready…I’m not ready for the seniors to graduate…I’m not ready for my friends to study abroad in the fall…I’m not ready to pack up and leave this campus and this community for the summer. But I guess I’m in luck, because I have four more weeks to spend here before summertime rolls around!

So, I have a little dilemma with this blog. Mostly, I am terrible at updating it. I want to post about the meaningful events of life, but I get busy actually participating in them and by the time I think about writing, I have no idea where to start! So…from this point forward, I’m going to try to update this blog once a week, no matter how meaningful or exciting the news might be. (we'll see how that goes..)

So what’s been happening for the past six weeks in my life? (this is the part where I have no idea where to start) Here’s a rundown…

I was the student assistant for the Beyond Borders Conference at Bluffton. I learned that air conditioning is kind of a big deal when it’s hot outside. I declared a major in Biblical Studies. I played frisbee with friends instead of writing a paper. I attended the International Conference on Conflict Resolution Education. I ate cereal out of a cup…for dinner. I went through intensive Hispanic Ministry training. I wore flip-flops outside in the snow. I registered for fall classes. I prayed and worshiped alongside professors and friends. I laughed...a lot. I was introduced to my new home where I’ll be moving this June. I learned about the epic sport of tennis golf. I got my financial aid package for next year and was reminded that the price of my education here is nothing compared to its value. I saw our campus with grass instead of snow for the first time. I ate pancakes with people I love in the town that will always be my home. I was chased by a cat…inside my dorm. I had conversations with friends and professors that stretched my understanding of peace, justice, and God’s Kingdom. I did homework…I even enjoyed homework. But most of all, I treasured every moment spent living in this community that is changing my life.

There are lots of exciting things coming up in these next few weeks and months, and I hope I will be better about updating this blog and sharing them with you all!

Live in peace. Live for peace.

Katie :)

Beautiful Ending

There’s this song that I listened to all the time while I was at ONU. It’s by BarlowGirl and it’s called “Beautiful Ending.” It really resonated with me as I transitioned into college and didn’t find the “beautiful ending” that I expected. I could relate to the chorus, begging God to promise a beautiful ending even if the rest of the story didn’t make sense yet. The chorus goes like this:

“So tell me, what is our ending? Will it be beautiful? So beautiful? Will my life find me by Your side? Your love is beautiful. So beautiful.”

The answer is yes.

God has led me and is leading me every single day to my beautiful ending. The path to this place was not the one I expected, nor was it one that I would have willingly chosen, but it was the only perfect path. What felt and looked like nothing more than huge mistake turned out to be a necessary and valuable chapter of God’s perfect plan. God is so faithful.

I’ve been at Bluffton now for six weeks. I’ve made a million memories and have so many stories to tell, but I’ll save that for another day. However, I will say this: these six weeks have transformed my life and completely changed how I view education. Bluffton is an incredible and unique place to live and learn. In fact, you can’t really separate one from the other: living and learning goes hand in hand here like I have never experienced before. I couldn’t tell you where school ends and life begins. My classes ARE my passions and my dreams. My professors double as mentors and friends. God is in my homework, and my homework glorifies my God. My school has become my community. My school has become my home.
Every single day, I thank God for leading me to Bluffton. I appreciate this place more because I remember the journey that brought me here. There have been so many moments when I have paused and realized that by the grace of God, I am exactly who and where I was created to be. By the grace of God, my beautiful ending found me.

“Weeping may linger for the night, but joy comes with the morning. You have turned my mourning into dancing; You have taken off my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, so that my soul may praise You and not be silent. O LORD my God, I will give thanks to You forever.” –Psalm 30: 5, 11-12

goodbye 2009. hello 2010!

365 days ago, I had 2009 all planned out. I would finish my senior year, graduate from high school, my family would move to our next church, and I would begin my freshman year of college. Pretty simple. While most of those things did happen, almost none of them happened as planned. Plans? Who follows those, anyway?

Here’s how it really went: I finished my senior year and graduated. We moved a couple weeks later, but not to a new church. And I did start my freshman year of college, but we all know that didn’t go as planned. There seemed to be a couple major themes of 2009…"I never imagined I would be doing [insert what I was doing]” and “But I swore I would never [insert what I was doing].” 2009 took me completely by surprise.

I spent my last months at the place I call home with the only people who have known me forever. I said goodbye to everything I had ever known. I answered God’s call on my life one beautiful summer night. I spent two months living awkwardly between what was and what would be. I found a second home 1,532 miles from my first one. I fell in love with some beautiful children whose smiling faces reflect God’s redemptive love rather than the struggles they have endured. I moved on to the future I had carefully chosen and learned that we never truly know what we want or need until we have it or don’t. I realized who I can live without and who I would never want to, and I made those relationships a priority. I treasured time spent with mentors whose love and wisdom I could never deserve. I experienced the tangible hope of a Church in the making. I learned that there are no mistakes with God, only valuable lessons waiting to be learned.

2009 didn’t go as planned. Perhaps that’s because my human plans didn’t leave room for God-sized beauty and creativity and love. As I look back on 2009, I thank God for each of you and the God-sized role that you played in my life this past year. And as I look ahead to 2010, I pray that you will join hands with me and walk by my side on this unpredictable, beautiful journey toward the heart of God.

Change.

Life changes so quickly.

In the space of two weeks, my life has been turned upside down. It’s been a crazy journey, but I couldn’t be happier with the end result.

This past week I withdrew from Ohio Northern University, and I will be enrolling at Bluffton University this week. I will move to Bluffton on January 10th, and begin classes the 11th.

Why?

There are several reasons, but I’ll make a painfully long story short and just share the two most important: programs and partying. The issue of programs was made obvious during my third day on campus at ONU, when I changed my major from Spanish & International Studies to Spanish & Religion; ONU’s International Studies program was just not a good match for my interests, goals, and passions. I loved the Religion program at ONU, but unfortunately that was not what I really wanted to study, it was simply the only other option at ONU. While I enjoyed my religion classes, I found myself wishing that I would be in program that would better prepare me to actually DO the ministry I have been called to do. Unfortunately, ONU is very much a pharmacy/science focused school, and that limited the program options for me.

Next, there was the partying. To state it simply, there was far more of it at ONU than I had anticipated and hoped. In most cases, the rules were either nonexistent or not enforced. Every weekend, I wished that I had chosen a stricter school. This was in NO way the deciding factor, but it did play a part in my decision.

Exactly two weeks ago, after hearing about these two frustrations, a friend suggested that I should check out Bluffton University. Bluffton is only 15 minutes from ONU, so that day I took a drive over to campus. I started looking into their programs online, and became really interested in their TESOL (teaching English to speakers of other languages) and Peace & Conflict Studies minors. Bluffton also offers a very strong Spanish major, which of course is important to me!  I called Bluffton the next day to schedule a campus visit.

During my campus visit, I got to sit in on three classes (two scheduled, then I got invited to a third class by a girl I met), meet with the directors of the TESOL and Peace & Conflict programs, go on a campus tour, have lunch in the dining hall, hang out with students…the usual. And I had a great day! The people there were extremely friendly (even the people who weren’t paid to be friendly), the classes were excellent, and I was VERY impressed with the interaction between the faculty and students. I loved the community feel of the campus.

But I’ve saved the best for last. During my meeting with the director of the Peace & Conflict Studies program, I heard two words that sealed the deal: individualized major. Yes. Individualized major. After hearing that I would come to Bluffton as a Spanish major with a double minor in TESOL and Peace & Conflict Studies, the professor said to me, “Why don’t you create an individualized major?” I had never heard of such a thing, but she went on to explain that I could work with faculty and build a major just for my needs, interests, and dreams. She suggested that I could use the TESOL program as the core of my second major, and I could add Peace & Conflict Studies classes, ministry classes, sociology classes, and even business classes (they have a specialty in church non-profit management!). This way, I could build a second major specializing in Hispanic ministry. So exciting! After searching and searching for a program that would be adequate, this opportunity to create the perfect program for me was a big surprise and an even bigger relief!

Also, Bluffton is a Christian college, so it has all of the opportunities and rules that come along with that. While I’m completely aware that no place is perfect, the partying and drinking is much less at Bluffton than at ONU. There are MUCH stricter rules, and fraternities and sororities are not permitted. And the Christian aspect of Bluffton, specifically the peace & justice oriented mission of the college, creates some exciting opportunities for me. For instance, the general education program starts and ends with classes that encourage students to apply their faith to everything they are learning. Also, there are TONS of Christian campus groups that I am excited about…there is even a Spanish worship team!

After I visited, I knew that I wanted to be a part of what I saw happening at Bluffton. Since I was in my second week of winter quarter at ONU and since Bluffton is on semesters, I told myself that I would just have to wait until fall 2010 to transfer. But the more I told myself and others, the more it just didn’t set well with me. The idea of staying at ONU and taking all general education classes spring quarter, just so the classes would transfer, sounded dreadful. I knew that God wanted me at Bluffton, but I didn’t know when. I spent a LOT of time praying and talking with lots of the important people in my life, and eventually decided that if it was possible for me to start at Bluffton for spring semester, I would go. Just three days after making this decision, after spending LOTS of time on the phone with Bluffton and LOTS of time getting paperwork in order, I withdrew from ONU and moved home. Things fell into place and happened EXTREMELY fast…the time between my first visit to Bluffton and when I withdrew from ONU? Exactly a week.

I got a call from Bluffton on Friday saying that all my paperwork had arrived, which was really exciting, since I needed official transcripts and transfer recommendations from three colleges and my high school, my FAFSA, and syllabi from all of the college classes I had taken. They told me that I would be accepted on Monday (tomorrow!), and I go down to campus on Tuesday to meet again with my transfer counselor, register for classes, get my financial aid package, and possibly even get my room assignment and roommate. I move to Bluffton on January 10th and I start classes on the 11th!

I will miss my friends at ONU, and I will especially miss my roomie! But I couldn’t stay there for those reasons. I know that God has amazing things in store for me; Bluffton is a place that will not only prepare me to do the ministry that I've been called to do, it is also a community that will support me as I become the servant of God that I was created to be! And what could be more exciting than that?!

“I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I'll listen. When you come looking for me, you'll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed.”
-Jeremiah 29:11-13 [MSG]

bienvenidos! :)

Hey everyone! :)

Two weeks ago, I was lucky enough to find myself in Dallas, TX at an event called Exploration! Exploration is a national event of the United Methodist Church for young adults who are exploring a call to ordained ministry in the UMC. It was an incredible time of seeking, listening, and discerning my call to ministry alongside more than 500 other young adults who are considering ordained ministry in the UMC. We were also joined by many of the current leaders in the denomination and representatives from all 13 of the United Methodist seminaries! It was an amazing opportunity to make connections and explore opportunities for ministry in the UMC.

Throughout the weekend, there were worship services, small group sessions, workshops, and a seminary fair. There were four words that summed up the goal of the weekend: "Hear. Discern. Respond. Go!" Each worship service focused on one of these words, and following worship we shared our dreams, ideas, concerns, and questions in our small groups. We each selected three workshop sessions to attend, and my workshops were: "How do I know I'm called?", "What does it mean to be a deacon?", and "Cross-Cultural Ministry." One of my favorite parts of the weekend was being able to talk with representatives from all 13 of the United Methodist seminaries. Going from table to table and meeting students & admissions representatives from each of our seminaries painted a whole new picture of what a seminary education can offer me. Exploration was by far the most awesome, informational, overwhelming, hope-filled weekend of my life! I have a million stories I would love to share, but you'll have to wait for those until the next time we meet face to face! :)

So...why am I telling you all this? Because while I was in Dallas, I did more than just explore. I committed. Exploration was the first step in my journey toward ordained ministry as a deacon in the United Methodist Church. Each day is the next step. This blog is your invitation to join me on this journey. Who's in?! :)